The other day I went to the vet to get my shots, or at least that's what they told me. Turns out I got a lot more than that. He examined me thoroughly. I even got my temperature taken with a rectal thermometer. (The indignity of it.) Then I got two needles. Now being a true wire fox terrier, I didn't gripe when he took my temperature. I didn't cry when I got the needles. I didn't bark or whine. I didn't even bite anybody!
But no matter how bad all that was, it paled in comparison to ............... the scale. They tried to get me to stand on the scale. It was a metal thing on the floor with a rubber mat on it and a screen with numbers. Like any self-respecting female, I wanted no part of it. So I fought them tooth and nail, gripping in my paws on their waxed tile floor so that they could not budge me. When they finally dragged me onto it, I walked right off! Don't they have it in my file that I have an aversion to scales? Finally, they were able to hold me down on the scale long enough for the numbers to stop changing so that they could get a glimpse of whatever number it settled on for a microsecond. It wasn't pretty.
Now I am on a diet and life isn't as much fun as it used to be. Instead of eating things like this....
(I won't explain this picture.)
or this....
(I won't explain this picture either.)
I am now eating this, or I should say, not eating this. (I am on a hunger strike.)
My mom even hid my regular treats on Grandpa, so he has to give me these low cal versions.
What have I ever done to them? I love everybody, even the vet. I give kisses to everybody. And now, look at how I am being treated. I could scream.
Tell me, do I look that fat? I'm just long, or big-boned, like Jackson says. Why don't they understand that? After all, they can lose a few pounds themselves, too.
But at least I was invited to join Jackson's Substantial Wire Fox Terrier Club! There is always a bright side.
23 comments:
Hey Koobie, I'm still hoping you're going to join our club. I promise no-dog will laugh at you. And you'll be a role model for other big boned female WFTs out there. Look at Lucky (Buster's sister), one of our posthumous members. She lived to be 19 years old!!!!! So please reconsider and send me a photo and your measurement from floor to top of your head. I won't publish your weight if you don't want me to! J x
Hi Koobuss!
You don't look overweight to me. Did those hooman add in their hands' weight too when they were holding you down?
Snuggle,
Precious
Are they trying to strave you? Should I send you a secret food parcel?
Simba xx
We think we need to start a petition that all scales be banned from the vets office! Do you think it would work, Koobie? You are NOT fat!
Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch
How rude of the vet! Our vet's scales is a flat rubber pressure pad on the floor,not too scary. But actually I like sitting on the scales!!
Toodle pip
Harry x
Hi, Koobus...
You look just fine to me...They must have made a mistake...Maybe there is something wrong with the scale...
Did they take your collar off when they weighed you???? That could make a difference...
Anyway, I bet if you do the Puppy Eyes at your Grandpa a few times, he'll find the REAL treats...
Abby xxxooo
i rather do more workout than to cut down my food...no way!
Koobie...it is clearly a mistake, but we are glad that the stupid vet's stupid mistake got you into the substantial dog club.
Here is a hint on the scale thing. Make sure a human(preferably a female human, like a muzzer) has to get on the scale WITH you, and then back on the scale to have their weight subtracted after you get off. Works every time.
gussie
Koobie....so yer joinin' Jackson's club, are ya? We'll if yer eatin' that low cal stuff, ya won't be in it fer long.... everytime my Mom gets a bit heavy...Gram puts her on the old green bean diet and she's been on that fer a while...keeps her under 20 lbs...when she used ta be 17...that's age fer ya.....enjoy the new treats...
Dewey Dewster in the country...
Hi Koobuss,
You look perfect to us!
How could they put you on a scale AND stare at the numbers?!? That's outrageous!
Wags and licks,
Maya and Kena
you do not look remotely overweight to me! if you want to see overweight check out tanner!
Koobie,
Don't feel so bad. I'm on the same dull diet here. I don't get why they are doing this to us poor wires but it is ABUSE! I wonder what they would do if we hid their yummy food and treats? I say we all should hide their goodies until they give ours back.
Kissies,
Romeo
Koobie, that scale must be too scawie for you. We usually get on it by command & we'll sit on it too when mommy tells us to. Actually I love that scale thing becoz it's all metal & cooooooold! I don't think you're all that fat,. Just a little bit on the plump side...Koobie, you're not the only one suffering here. We're on a strict diet too. No more meaty soup, meat or even vegetables. Just plain kibbles!
Love licks,
Solid Gold Dancer
Hi, Koobie!
I know about mean scales and diets!
You are right. they are not fun!
You don't look fat. Maybe that scale needs a verification!
Kisses and hugs
Lorenza
Oh Koob, I am so sorry!
Mr Scooter is on a diet too an he duzzent like it wun bit. But arfter he got stuk in the catflap thare waz no choyse. Well, then Mummy got a bigger catflap, wun that's reelly for small dogs, so ov corse THEN he thort, "AHA! Now I don't need to be on a diet!" but no luk. He is still on a diet.
He duzzent go in in the middol yet but his fur is a bit looser. Lookt like he waz goin to burst befor!
Oh gosh I wud hate to think ov yu burstin. Better eet the diet stuff they giv yu!
An wat on ERTH is that in yor mowth? I thort it waz a toad at ferst.... now it looks like a ded thing yu dug up... oh say it aint so!
:@D
Oh dear Koobie... Please dont scream. You don't look overweight to me at all
~ Girl girl
I don't think you look fat at all....Maybe if you run in circles for 5 minutes and explain to your mum that you exercised for like forever a lil tasty treat would be appreciated.
Deetz
Koobie
Don't fret use are bootiful just the way use are, I hears Pugs tend to get pudggy so Nanny is very careful of whats I get to eats, so now I get healthy treats and they tastes pretty good, Petra gave us the recipe use should haves use Mom make some to help keep use svelte figure.
Hugs, bellyrubs, smoochies
Pearl
G'day Koobuss
You've got a gorgeous figure, what's everyone talking about.
Fancy making you step on the scales....girls don't do scales....sheesh!
Hugs and tail wags
Noah Willow Tess Lucy
Oh gosh Koobie it's horrible being on a diet. Mom weighed me at home and then I was on one too. All she did was cut everybody's food down, not just me, 'cause she thought everyone was fat! Aw man..
Now I'm slimmer but I miss all those treats and cookies she used to give us. So much so that today while Mom and Dennis were gone I stole a loaf of bread, ripped open the bag, and ate a couple of pieces. They had to throw that whole thing away. I wasn't even done with it! meanies..
Rudy
Ah...Koobie...it's more of you to love, my pet!!!
And...Mumsie puts small pieces of treats all over the scales at the vetties...we all like to jump on and snarf them up and we don't freak out anymore....works for us!!!
They put you on lo cal dog food...ur all fur, Koob...meanies...try the green beans like Dewey suggested...sounds better than diet food!!! Though our predecessor Sarge ate diet food for years and loved it...he was a substantial wire...it's all in the genes!!!
Love you lots,
Scruffy
Shocking. That's no way to treat a member of the aristocracy.Stoopid vet. Want me to come over and give him a snarl or too? I'll bring some snackies at the same time too.
Wiry wags, Eric x
Well they say I gained 3 pounds over the winter..WHAT DO THEY WANT!! I had to tend to Archie every minute and we weren't walking and with that plasma TV he had in his crate and all the snow....Geesh....Love A+A
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