Bench Warmer

Hello,

I'm new here. My name is Whitey. My job is bench warmer. I'll stick around while the weather is to my liking. If it heats up, I am outta here -- carrot and all. And I'll take all my flakey friends with me. Here today, gone tomorrow, sometimes.

Koobie doesn't care for me too much. She keeps giving me the cold shoulder. I wonder why? I have a nice smile and I'm very well dressed in my black top hat and red scarf. People even say I am cute. Koobie thinks I'm full of cold air. She wants me gone. Maybe it's because I took her seat. This is one of her favorite spots to sit with grandpa in the warm weather. But she won't be seeing me then. I go south for the summer -- way south.




What a muddle. Mighty Whitey becomes a puddle.

Roachin'

Hi Friends,

Here I am just roachin' on a lazy morning. I always like to finish sleeping on the parlor couch. It's a nice comfy spot.

A while back I was tagged by someone, sorry I forget who, to post a picture of me roaching. After all this time my mom was finally able to get some roaching photos. So here they are. I would now like to tag anyone else who hasn't yet been tagged about roaching. No hurry. You can't rush roaching. It took me over six months to do it right.

No Respect

Hi Everybody,

Did you ever have the feeling that you get no respect? Well, watch this.

In Honor of Turkeys Everywhere

Hello My Dear Friends,

I'd like to introduce you to my friend Tom. He’s stuffed. For the next couple of days he and others like him will be the center of attention. In his honor I wrote these three limericks. I’d really like to write a more complex form of poetry, but what do you expect for a turkey? Let me rephrase that. I mean, in honor of a turkey. (My name is Koobuss, not Shakespeare.)






Number One

We knew a turkey named Henery
Who soon became a memory
When Thanksgiving was on
Henery was gone
Not to he found this century.


Number Two

We once had a turkey named Tish
Who turned out to be quite a dish
When at the table
She was able
To prove that she wasn’t a fish.



And, finally, an after dinner poem:

Here I sit alone
Without even a bone
It’s not fair
That I wasn’t there
Now all I do is moan


HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYBODY!!!!!




PEE ESS Our snow is all gone already and the grass has returned, as you can see. To my friends who want me to mail them some snow, unfortunately, I cannot do that at the present time. There is none available now. You will have to get on a waiting list. I’m sure that we will have more snow in the future and I will be able to fill your orders then. Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yes, So Soon

So Soon?

Hi Friends,

Look what we have!!! I think it's almost time for Santa. They tell me that the Turkey comes first, but I'm not sure I believe that.
Not with all this stuff!! (I think they're trying to fool me again.)

Glasses

Tonight I stole my mom's new reading glasses off her when she was on the phone with kousin Layla's mom. Hehe. They are brand new. She just got them this afternoon. I was sitting on her lap when I noticed the glasses on her shirt where people her age put them when they are not reading so they'll be out of the way but still handy. I grabbed them quick, jumped off her lap, and ran up the steps to the kitchen. By the time she excused herself from the conversation, put the phone down, got out of the recliner, and over to the steps, I was waiting for her on the top step with the glasses in my mouth and my tail wagging. I looked so cute that she could not yell at me. Instead, she reached for her little camera that is always supposed to be nearby but wasn't, and I took off. So she missed a great photo op. She found me in the sun room by the patio door. She then took this rather mundane photo of me with her glasses. If you look closely, you can see the one earpiece on the right. By now I figured that she was frustrated enough, so I gave her the glasses back without a fight, since I also earlier took both her socks off her. (I know when to back off.) Layla, on the other end of the phone, thought this was all pretty funny.



See what happens when you are grounded for so long and get bored. Luckily, I didn't chew her glasses so she wasn't real mad. I think I'll be able to go to Penn State's game this weekend. Thanksgiving is coming and I don't want to be in trouble then. Soon after that Santa will be showing up, so I have to behave myself for that. YIKES!! Then ski season. Oh boy.

I'M SORRY!!!!!

Grounded Again

Hi Everybody,

Here I am, grounded again. When I got home today my family was really mad at me. I told them that I was going with some friends to visit my sick Kousin Asta in New York, which is what we did! I didn't know that Asta was feeling better, or that Dewey had a bladder infection and needed a lot of fire hydrants, or that the car was going to flip over when Lacie bumped the steering wheel and land upside down on the fire hydrant, or that I was going to get in trouble with the police for all my traffic violations, and get arrested, and Asta would bail us out and have all our records sponged off, and that we would go shopping all day and buy lots of stuff and that Scruffy would give me the wrong directions and we'd go to Lantic City instead of home, and Asta Marie would win millions of dollars and pay all the bills including my traffic fines and parking tickets and we'd meet Axel in Philadelphia for the Penn State game and then we'd all fly to Disney World in Orlando, Florida for Suki's pawty, then fly back home and Asta Marie would pay for everything, and we'd be gone for a week instead of just overnight like I said. You gotta believe me!! I didn't know any of that would happen!

My kar is in storage now because it's a convertible and winter is coming. Besides, mom's really mad.

I don't think I'll be going anywhere for a while.

cry, cry

Jackpot!!!

Hi Everybody,

As you know, when we were on our way home to Pennsylvania from Asta's house in New York City, we took a wrong turn and went south instead of west. We ended up in Lantic City, and Asta Marie, Dewey's mother, wanted to stay and play some slot machines. So we did. She and Scruffy gambled while Lacie, Dewey, and I played on the boardwalk and beach. Last night, Asta Marie hit the jackpot and won several million dollars!!! The hotel/casino gave us a free room for the night and all the free meals we could eat. This morning they took Asta Marie's picture on the beach. Here she is with her famous smile. Asta Marie paid for everything!! --my kar repairs, tow truck charges, pawking fees, all our purchases, and more!

Scruffy lost.

Then we left for Philadelphia, and the Penn State-Temple game. We got there early, and met up with our good buddy Wiry Axel, outside the gate. Here we all are waiting for the gate to open so that we can go to our seats. I got another great pawking spot. All six of us went to the game, and Asta Marie paid for everything! Even my pawking ticket.


I finally got a chance to wear my new Penn State t-shirt that my dear Scruffy got me for my birthday! It fits perfectly, but what are these holes for?






After the game we are flying from Philadelphia to Orlando for Suki's pawty at Disney World. We'll put the kar in long term pawking. Monday we will fly back to Philadelphia, drive home to my house, and then Scruffy, Lacie, Asta Marie, and Dewey will fly back to Pittsburgh. Asta Marie is paying for everything!! (We'll have to take her with us all the time. HeHe)

Departure

Hi Friends,

My car is all fixed and I just picked it up from the car fix place and now I have to get my friends Scruffy, Lacie, Dewey, and his dogmom Asta Marie for our trip back home to Pennsylvania. It's time to say "Good-Bye" to Asta, and to thank her for being so nice to us. We did cause some problems when we first arrived, but everything turned out okay. All we have to do now is to stay straight on this road and head west. Should be no trouble.




I don't remember this when we were coming. This does not look like Pennsylvania. Is Scruffy holding the map wrong again?? He is!!! We went south instead of west!! How did that happen??? We are lost again!!! Oh, no!! Scruffy!!!!



This is Lantic City!!! We have to turn around. "Wait!", says Asta Marie. "I have lots of money left since I didn't go shopping with you girls. I was at the all-day spa instead. I want to stay and play the slot machines. We don't get to Lantic City too often from Pittsburgh."



So, I changed lanes and drove into the city. Like always, I got a great parking spot with no trouble at all. I'm lucky like that.
















Only Asta Maire and Scruffy are old enough to gamble so the rest of us had to wait outside for them. They were a very long time, going from casino to casino.

Lacie, Dewey, and I were bored, so we decided to check some things out.




Who are these guys? We got 'em surrounded. You can't escape from three terriers!













WOW!! Look at this. Wonder what's on the other side. Maybe we could go for a swim to find out.

LOOK!!

LOOK!!!

They're towing my car away!! OH NO! What do we do now?? I'm in big trouble! That's my birthday present! How am I going to explain this when I get home? How am I going to get home? (CRY, CRY, CRY)

Arrival!

Hey Asta,

We're here!! Look out your window!! We had a small mishap and I didn't get the car parked next to the curb stone (a violation). Dewey has been having bladder problems all day and when he saw the fire hydrant on your street, he got so excited that he jumped out of the back seat, all the way across the windshield and landed right next to the fire hydrant. Meanwhile, Lacie tried to stop him, and bumped my paw that was on the steering wheel. I slammed on the brakes and veered at the same time and the kar flipped over and landed right on top of the fire hydrant upside down! Because none of us were wearing our seat belts (another violation), we all went flying, except for Dewey who was standing by the hydrant on three legs relieving himself (another violation). All of this is in the police report. I hope I don't lose my license.

Fortunately, none of us were hurt seriously since our fur protected us in our landings. Scruffy may have a minor head injury, but it's hard to tell with Scruffy. I'm sure there is no brain damage, at least none that I could notice.

I'm sorry that we arrived so late at night and made all that noise when we got here, waking up everybody in the neighborhood. At least we got here before the rain started. We rode around the city all day before we found your building since Scruffy was holding the map upside down, again. Did you know that there are a lot of streets here that all look alike? There are also an awful lot of cars, especially yellow ones. That seems to be a big color here. (I prefer red myself). We kept passing tall buildings and bridges. We even saw a lady out in the water with a torch in one hand and a book in the other. She didn't move once.

Anyway Asta, we are so happy to be here and look forward to spending a lot of time together. We may have to move in with you since my kar is unavailable and will be for some time. At least we have our credit cards.

Here We Come!

Look out Kousin Asta. Here we come!

Me (Kousin Koobie), Scruffy, Lacie, and Dewey are coming to see you. We want to cheer you up to help you to feel better. (You're not contagious, are you?)

I hope that this is the right exit. If not, we may be a while. If you don't see us by Tuesday, my cell phone number is ? I forget, since I never call myself. You'll have to ask somebody else because don't remember it.

Have lots of food ready. We're hungry!! We haven't eaten since we left the boonies.
And I think we'll need to use the nearest fire hydrant. You know how it is when you're traveling.

Saturday

We're on our way to today's Penn State game. I have to pick up Scruffy, Lacie, and Dewey.






Here's a stadium. We got here quicker than I thought!! There's a parking spot. Got to grab it before somebody else does!!! See ya later.

KOOBUSS